Today 31 Dec 2009 12.00 is goin to be a big day 4 al of us and night for some…I BEG THAT YOU THINK BEFORE YOU ACT ALWAYS!!!!! “Is what you are doing worth it? WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?(Seriously)” <<<< I wan’t those questions to be BRANDED into your mind. Life is NO GAME TRUST ME, Your life could END before you see 2010, …Wudnt tht be a WASTE!! I AIN’T passing no Judgement Best Believe dat. I am simply WARNING YOU AGAINST THROWING your LIFE AWAY, JUST BECAUSE OF ONE NIGHT, ONE STUPID NIGHT!!!!! “But I won’t Die 2day”-HOW do YOU KNOW DAT? “Its the in thing”-OPEN YOURS EYES, Believe it or NOT Its MIND CONTROL, Hu told u it was ite, wer dd they learn it from, dnt think u to good to be hypotised by tht crap, cos u are if u fall victim to … See Moreit. and Yes Booze, By Drinking it YOU R BECOMING ITS SLAVE(In Jesus You are not a slave to anythin/any1 you are free). Lyk I sed LIFE IS NO GAME, Heaven and Hell exist, wer Do you want to go? DNT JUST SAY Heaven, cos its the appropriate answer, If you are truly a Follower of THE CHRIST(The One who Died For You and Is God in The Flesh) Isaiah 53:6, “All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the LORD hath laid on him the iniquity of us all.” Is it too little to ask for Good Behavior…Compare tht Good Behavior To Dying On The Cross For You…Will WE turn our backs on tht, or will EACH ONE OF US, THANK HIM for such Mercy. IT IS UP TO YOU!!! DON’T EVEN THINK OF JUST READING AND SAYING WOW…, I WANT YOU TO READ TO YOU HEART, And READ The WORD OF GOD(I Prefer this version, recent ones have IMPORTANT MISSING INFO: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/Bible/1611_authorized_king_james.htm). Go Down On Your Knees and Pray, Dnt do it cos i sed so, Do It Cos You Love Him…http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/how_to_be_saved.html JESUS IS THE ONLY WAY TO HEAVEN “I am the way the truth and the life; NO MAN cometh unto the Father BUT BY ME.” — Jesus Christ (John 14:6)
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Book Review: ‘The Drug User - Documents 1840-1960’
The Drug User
Printed in 1991, ‘The Drug User: Documents 1840-1960’ is an anthology of drug-related literature that dates from before the beginnings of the psychedelic counterculture movement. Edited by John Strausbaugh and Donald Blaise, with a forward by William S. Burroughs, ‘The Drug User’ is filled with a literary flair so often missing from later psychedelic literature.
The anthology’s editors have amalgamated an extremely impressive collection. It includes both complete pieces and selected passages from larger works. Such diverse writers as Twain, Freud, Baudelaire and Daumal to Ludlow, Michaux and Lee, are presented. With such an eclectic mix of great writers and thinkers there is imbued some wonderful, challenging and, at times, scary perceptions of the drug experience.
One of my favourite passages is taken from ‘Really the Blues’ by “half-cat jazz musician” Mezz Mezzrow. Just before playing a gig Mezz and his compatriots smoked some cannabis:
“The other guys in the band were giggling and making cracks, but I couldn’t talk with my mouthpiece between my lips, so I closed my eyes and drifted out to the audience with my music. The people were going crazy over the subtle changes in our playing; they couldn’t dig what was happening but some kind of electricity was crackling in the air and it made them all glow and jump.”
There are also battles going on in the individuals; especially those writing on using opiates. Burroughs would later write on the topic succinctly in Junky but Antonin Artaud had already begun to surmise the dark power of opiates in his most literary of ways:
“We, whom pain makes journey into our souls in search of a calm place to cling to, in search of stability in evil, as the others search for it in good – we aren’t mad, we’re marvellous doctors, we know the necessary dose for the soul, for sensibility, for the marrow, for thought.”
The anthology challenges the reader to think about an individual’s relationship with drugs, from a time when the social hysteria had yet to emerge and cast its own shadow over the experience. Though, having said that, one can see the seeds for the psychedelic movement during this period in the writings of Aldous Huxley, Albert Hoffman and Gordon Wasson (it was Wasson who first discovered the ancient religious use of psilocybin mushrooms in Mexico.)
For those interested in the drug experience/culture as a literary movement this is an extremely valuable anthology. Not only is it a gateway into other works but it also beautifully contextualizes various perspectives. I’ll leave you with some words by Aldous Huxley, taken from ‘Drugs that shape men’s minds’ and that goes someway to explaining the course that the newly seeded psychedelic movement would pass into post-1960:
“My own belief is that, though they may start by being something of an embarrassment, these new mind changers will tend in the long run to deepen the spiritual life of the communities in which they are available.”
Monday, December 28, 2009
Execution In China
I am of course opposed to the Death Penalty. It is a logical extension of my Catholicism, Christianity…that we should be Life-Enhancing rather than Life Taking. Yet it is not easy to have any kinda sympathy for the drug courier who will possibly be executed in China tomorrow.
Of course he is not photogenic and is of Asian origin, therefore the British tabloids will not rush to his aid. Much better if “he” was a pretty blonde female schoolteacher from the Cotswolds and tearfully protesting that she was duped by her lover.
Sorry……no sympathy………if Britons, Irish, australians, Americans whatever want to take on high risk criminality smuggling drugs in or out of China, Thailand, wherever……then they should face the consequences.
It's a wonder he can walk at all
kid in a candy store 40 years later
(Hugh Laurie as House, M.D.)
He’s got a real sweet tooth
Picture by: dunno source Caption by: Sarah101 via Our LOL Builder
» Recaption This!
» View All Captions
Monday, December 21, 2009
Brittany Murphy was struggling with poor body image
Since her passing yesterday from cardiac arrest, actress Brittany Murphy’s friends are beginning to speak out about her struggle with a poor body image.
Clueless director Amy Heckerling believes the problem may have originated from the set of their film:
“She seemed to go through a change on Clueless. Maybe she felt like she was not the, like, skinny, pretty girl, you know? And then the next few movies she was, you know, thinner, blonde … going out with Eminem and Ashton Kutcher.”
Another source said:
“A lot of her problems were due to poor self-image. She wore extraordinary amounts of makeup, tons of fake eyelashes, got her teeth capped, dyed her hair blonde, lost weight – she wanted to be a beauty. She didn’t want to be the fat girl from Clueless. She didn’t eat a lot. She would drink copious amounts of coffee.”
32-year-old Murphy was rumored to have troubles with drug abuse and eating disorders. The authorities found several prescription medications in the actress’ home and she had been suffering from flu-like symptoms in the days leading up to her death.
Murphy’s body is currently undergoing an autopsy, against the wishes of her husband Simon Monjack. The autopsy will take four to eight weeks for toxicology results to come back with a final cause of death.
Davao dads to restrict sprouting of container yards in the city
December 16, 2009 1:59 pm
DAVAO CITY, Dec. 16 – The City Council here is set to restrict the sprouting of container yards in the city following the discovery of almost 16 kilos of high-grade cocaine last week.
Majority Floor Leader Danilo Dayanghirang said a possible solution would be the “zonification” of these container yards to contain them all in one area for easier inspection by authorities.
Dayanghirang also said the council must fully investigate the incident to find ways on how to prevent the future smuggling of illegal drugs in the city.
The city council will conduct an inquiry on the discovery of the cocaine inside the container yard once it resumes work after the holidays, he said.
Dayanghirang said aside from identifying zones for the container yards, drug-sniffing dogs must also be used in the yards to ensure that no illegal drugs would enter the Davao market.
Davao City Police Office (DCPO) Director Ramon Apolinario supported Dayanghirang’s call, saying the use of K-9 dogs is essential in any operations against terrorism and illegal drugs.
Dayanghirang said he would ask the committee on public safety headed by Councilor Nilo Abellera to conduct the committee hearing.
On December 9, workers of Maersk discovered white powdery substance inside the reefer machine located at the back of two container vans that came from India and Pakistan.
The next day, another pack of powdery white substance was found in another container van inside the Maersk container yard.
The police confirmed the powdery white substance was high-grade cocaine valued at P110 million. (PNA)
Friday, December 18, 2009
Her eyes are focusing!!!
Now, I know I said I would stop writing about Lindsay Lohan as soon as a picture emerges of her where she doesn’t look like a cracked-out, sex-hungry asylum escapee (or something along those lines)… but now that picture has somewhat appeared I just have to celebrate.
Her face actually looks fairly normal! Her makeup is toned down, both her eyes are looking in the same direction, and she’s cracking that gorgeous smile rather than doing the duckface.
Now all we need to worry about is the worrying clothes, hair and BMI.
I just want to give her a sandwich and a haircut. And a new pair of tights.
Progress Lindsay, progess.
Fear of violence after killing of drug lord in Mexico
As Mexican and US officials have hailed the killing of top drug lord (Marcos) Arturo Beltrán Leyva, many are fearing further violence in the struggle to replace him.
Arturo Beltran Leyva, nicknamed the “boss of bosses,” was killed in a shoot-out with the navy south of Mexico City late on Wednesday, along with six cartel members.
The killing gave a boost to President Felipe Calderon’s controversial three-year military clampdown on drug gangs, which has been accompanied by a spike in violence, leaving some 15,000 dead.
Calderon called the navy raid in which the drug lord was killed “an important achievement for the government and people of Mexico.”
However many have warned that the high-profile killing could provoke further turf wars.
“We can’t rule out the possibility of in-fighting, until a new line of command is defined,” Attorney General Arturo Chávez Chávez said on Thursday.
Beltran Leyva was one of five brothers who split from the country’s most powerful Sinaloa Cartel several years ago and aligned themselves with previous competitors from other gangs in a bid to counteract their influence.
Many say that the Sinaloa cartel, which has had a firm support base in western Mexico for decades and operates across the world, would gain the most from Beltran Leyva’s death.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
New H1N1 vaccine scandal - government screwed up
U.S. Recalls 800,000 Swine Flu Vaccine
December 12, 2009 by Joanne Silberner
After massive efforts to convince the public that it should get vaccinated against the swine flu virus, the government Tuesday recalled 800,000 doses of vaccine targeted to children. The recall, which was based on potency concerns, may lead to fresh worries that the government rushed to get the product on the market too quickly.
bureaucracy, children, crisis, drugs, gaffe, government, health, health care, marxism, medicine, nanny state, news, oversight, pandering, political correctness, politics, public policy, scandal, socialism
Deadly Popcorn and AOL News: Typos in the Nuwz...I Mean News
Sphere, the new name for AOL News, has published an article about the dangers of diacetyl, a chemical used in artificial butter flavoring that has been linked to the deaths of hundreds, and lung failure in others, who are either exposed to the chemical from working with it or from a microwave popcorn addiction, “Just When You Thought It Was Safe To Make Popcorn“.
I suppose typos could be deadly, but no such instances come to mind. We may question the lethality of typos, but we cannot question their frequent occurrence in news stories:
In a report made public last week, NIOSH [National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health] said that investigators found concentrations of butter flavoring agent 2,3-pentanedione in liquid buttermilk flavoring and during production of a bakery mixes.
Delete the letter “a” and you’ve got a respectable paragraph, ladies and gentlemen.
Monday, December 14, 2009
"Seester for saille, only 5 peso": Jarv's best of South America and Africa
Hola,
Today we do South America and Africa in my epic quest to find the best films of the decade. This is a short list (only 5 titles- I like round numbers), because if I’ve even heard of them, let alone seen them, then they’re automatically good, and I hadn’t seen as many as I thought- only about 15- I could have put 10 in, but I don’t think the bottom 3 warrant making a best of list, so there are a few near misses that I’m not mentioning. These are actually the best ones- and I’ve included the only one I outright hate as the Dishonourable Mention. I’ve got a couple more Brazilian Films to watch so I may come back and add to it, so we’ll see. Not to mention that several of them that I thought were 21st Century were actually late 90’s.
Anyhow on with the list.
5) Linha De Passe (2008-Brazil)
I find it difficult to write about this film. I mean, I know objectively it is a good film (I don’t think Sallas has ever made a bad one), but it was billed in this country as a sequel to the simply magnificent Central Station. It isn’t. It doesn’t even cover the same material.
Anyhow, LDP covers the tribulations of a favella dwelling Sao Paulo family. The heavily pregnant mother is a maid for a rich woman, the eldest son dreams of being a footballer, but he’s too old, the second son is a sort of priest in his spare time while holding down a shitty job in a petrol station, the second youngest is an out-and-out scumbag while the youngest is merely a kid. It is a good film, with moments of genuine brilliance (the motorcycle scenes), but at the end of the day it is an unremittingly bleak film and I can’t help but think it’s a tad overrated.
In all honesty, if you feel in the mood to watch a violence free film about poverty in Brazil, then watch Central Station. This is a good film, but that one is a great film.
4) The Devil’s Backbone (2001- Mexico)
Now we’re talking. Before Del Toro made his way to Hollywood to make Comic book films, he was a horror director of some note. This, his sophomore effort, is a genuinely frightening ghost story set in a Spanish orphanage.
It’s a taut little film, but what elevates it head and shoulders above the crowd is the performance of the kids. Creepy, compelling stuff. To be honest, like with all Del Toro’s stuff, I found the non-supernatural elements of the film to be far more interesting than the ghost story. He captures life for the orphans in fascist Spain in a gripping and compelling fashion. A really, really good film.
3) Y Tu Mama Tambien (2001- Mexico)
I said this about Shaun of The Dead, but I think the same applies to this film- everyone forgets how fresh it was on release. Cuaron’s pre Harry Potter film is surprisingly complex, even if you can see the ending coming a mile away.
A cross between a coming of age story and a road movie, YTMT relies heavily on the central performances of the young leads, and luckily for them one of them is Bernal. It’s not a melodrama, as such, but it is a diverting time, and I stick it on every now and again at home if I can’t think of what else to watch.
It was unfairly labeled as soft porn in this country on release, but if you’re looking for wank material then this isn’t it.
You do have to wonder about the 28 year old woman that’s molesting them though.
2)Tsotsi (2005- South Africa)
This makes my best of the decade list, so I’m going to be brief with this as well. It was billed as the South African version of City of God. It isn’t- that’s absolute horseshit.
What it is, is a redemption story of a young township dwelling thug as he has to come to terms with the fact that he’s accidentally kidnapped a baby. It has none of the kinetic energy of City of God, and is not really comparable. Rather, I think this is a touching story, that’s well filmed and although it’s clearly going to end badly for our thug hero, you kind of hope that it won’t.
Stirring, Oscar winning stuff and well worth a couple of hours of anyone’s time.
1)City of God (2003- Brazil)
As is to be expected, this Brazilian masterpiece (based on a true story) also ranks in my top 10 of the decade.
City of God is a kaleidoscope of mayhem and violence charting a young slum dweller, Rocket, as he grows up during the rise and fall of one of Rio de Janeiro’s most notorious gangsters. A fucking monster of a film- and one that is endlessly entertaining, truly gripping and stylistically superb.
Apparently Meirelles next film, Blindness, is a steaming stack of shit, but that doesn’t matter- this is enough of a legacy for anyone.
Dishonourable Mention:
Maria full of Grace (2003-Columbia)
Load of fucking hand wringing nonsense about drugs mules. I’ll give you a clue- fuckheads- this kind of blatantly manipulative shit only works if you give a fuck about any of the characters in the film.
Needless to say, I thought she was an obnoxious cow, and as such I did not even summon up the slightest bit of interest at her plight.
Fuck this noise. It’s also as boring as fuck, but that is a direct consequence of crushing itself to death by being “worthy”. It does, to be fair, ask questions, but half the problem is that it doesn’t even bother trying to answer them.
Rubbish. Pah.
As usual, I’ve more than likely forgotten some, and I will be returning to update this list later (I’m thinking about a few more, that I desperately need to rewatch before putting them in or out)
Ciao
Jarv
I Wear My Sunglasses at Night!
Night driving has always been problematic for me. The headlights from oncoming traffic not only distract me, they actually hurt my eyes.
After being somewhat discouraged yesterday about not feeling anything from the meds, I gradually upped the dose (within the parameters my doctor set for me for incremental increases). This morning I took 5mg. Usually, I am very groggy in the mornings. In college, anything before 11am was a sure bet for a C or less….Though slightly tired from the busy week this week (all three children were in a theatrical production this weekend, and we’ve had rehearsals, etc.), I “woke up” much faster than usual.
Further, I felt more “aware” of my surroundings, not like “zoned out.” For my afternoon dose, I took the remaining half of yesterday’s half-tablet, along with another 5mg. Wow! It was as if the fog lessened at bit. I think I still need to go up to the full 20mg per day total, but driving was finally a treat!
I am usually a terrible driver. I’ve had accidents, ridden over the curb, difficulty gauging parking spaces (as in, depth perception issues, maybe??), lead foot, slamming on the brakes because I didn’t notice the car slowing/stopped in front of me…But none of that happened! And, the oncoming traffic didn’t bother me, either!
Not a huge difference in motivation, but definitely an improvement on a small scale! Though my doctor gave me papers to fill out, I am finding this site much more effective in tracking my progress (and in far more detail).
(Hat tip to ADD Forums for the site recommendation!)
Friday, December 11, 2009
Medication Errors - Do You Know Your Meds?
Hospital patients are unsure of drugs they are taking
A study found 44% of hospital patients believed they were being given a drug when, in fact, it had not been prescribed. Data showed 96% of patients could not remember one or more of the medications prescribed for them during their hospital stay. The lead researcher said communicating with patients can help add a layer of protection against medication errors. Yahoo!/HealthDay News (12/10)
Holidays and Grief
Holidays for grieving parents can be a nightmare. Often times, the anticipation leading up to the event can literally put a fragile parent in a downward spiral, especially the newly bereft. We need to know it’s all right to decline invitations, to decide NOT to celebrate Holidays the usual way, because what has happened to a mourning parent isn’t usual at all.
Friends and family can help make the grief stricken parents survive, by offering alternatives and supporting them in their decision. Some parents find doing the routine of Holidays past can be healing, some set a place at the table for their departed child. Some parents leave town, and go somewhere that they aren’t constantly reminded of their loss, instead of having the traditional family gathering. This helps them get through the painful reminder that their child is no longer with them to celebrate. Other parents do nothing at all.
No matter what your choice, this Holiday season, remember it is your choice and no one has the right to tell you how you should or should not celebrate. Your life is different, now, you are a different person. Learning how to live your life after the death of a child takes time mixed with tears. How much time? How many tears? No one can answer that for you. It has been 10 years since my son, Kelly, died. Each holiday brings me to my knees, but knowing this can happen arms me with the knowledge that it will pass. Anticipation, for me and many others, is always worse than the actual Holiday. Our celebrations aren’t the same as when my son was alive, they are new traditions that include him. I light a candle in front of his picture, I have his Drummer Boy ornament that is placed near the top of the tree every Christmas, the quilt I made from his favorite T-shirts rests on the back of my chair. I sing to him, at the cemetery, as I decorate his crypt for each season, Holiday, Birthday, and Angel Day. I could never forget my child, I carry him with me always.
Now, as Thanksgiving looms, I am becoming anxious & sad. I find myself aching for one more hug, one more chance to hear the sound of his infectious laughter. On Thanksgiving Day, I will give thanks for the 28 years we were given. Thanks for being his Mother. Thanks for all the lessons he has taught me both in life and in death.
In loving memory of Kelly Arthur Hubenthal
August 7, 1967 to June 29, 1996
Forever in our hearts, with love.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Frankie Gets Punked by Anthony and Dakota - shortfilmzz123 Youtube
Frankie Gets Punked by Anthony and Dakota – shortfilmzz123 Youtube
The Ultimate revenge, an eye for an eye in this case its hair for a weed.
You’ll understand once you watch the video.
Video was provided by shortfilmzz123 on youtube.
This one made me crack up!
Poor Frankie! 
Lighters Up
Lighters up
like at a Queen concert
if Freddie Mercury were still alive
if you were still alive
singing Bohemian Rhapsody
Mama, just killed a man
a lot like Miss Jones,
I think I just shot her son
I think it just snowed in East Texas
Who knew
memories of you would get me
singing Randy Travis
higher than the pine trees
that grow tall upon the hill
The one in the summer
where we used to smoke pot
I thought, what’s wrong
with this neighborhood?
urban life decay
I look for you everywhere:
In crossword puzzles,
clouds, thin air, Rumble Fish,
katamari damacy, Disneyland,
flour bags, grocery stores,
dreams, nightmares, everywhere
Wouldn’t you?
Lighter’s up
its flame
cathedral champaign
and my bleeding heart
A most beautiful ruby red.
Monday, December 7, 2009
Drugs mad house
last Saturday (5th Dec 2009) we going to clean the 2 houses in norwich which is full of mess everywhere..
When we start cleaning at 196 Kingwood Ave near norwich and in upstars rooms which is full of mess and saw some compost on floors and in the kicthen there some drugs of weed left near the sink!!!
also in 43 barrett road norwich which is there same mess from 196 kingwood ave!!!
what the hell wrong with those people!!!!
Mango Trypping: Chapter II
A cold wind flattened Captain Halloran’s fringe against his forehead. Both his hands were occupied, one holding the loose end of a thick metal cable, and the other wrapped tightly around the rigging. Blinded by his slightly-too-long brown hair, Captain Halloran’s only choice was to flick his head somewhat cinematically. He groaned as he realised how pretentious that would’ve looked to his crew, a good two thirds of which was standing below him, presumably looking up and snickering. Great, he thought. All I need now is a knife held between my teeth and a stirring soundtrack. Regaining composure, the Captain threaded the cable through a winch above his head, then rappelled down the mast, cable trailing behind him. His heavy boots hit the deck and the gathered crew cheered.
“That’s enough!” The Captain shouted over the sarcastic applause. “Enough of that cheek.” He turned, fastened the cable to a hook at the base of the mast, and pushed through the crew toward his quarters.
“And how long did it take you to do your hair this morning, oh Captain my Captain?” asked a slight, blonde, bespectacled observer.
“Shut it, Julian.” Captain Halloran grumbled, but he couldn’t really hide his smile.
Julian Walton was Joe’s library companion. The pair would set up camp in the university library. Joseph would spread himself across a soft lounge chair, boots propped up on the nearest desk. On the floor beside the lounge would lie a stack of dusty books, most picked on whims, subjects like geography, languages, history, sometimes astronomy. Joseph would sit so slouched that he could select a new book from his stack without stretching. Jules would sit straight-backed at a desk further away from the lounge, reading glasses perched on his small, straight nose. Joe could tell when his friend was particularly interested in what he was reading; Jules would lean over his book, rest his cheek on his hand, elbow propped on the desk, and run his other hand through his dark blonde hair. His eyes would widen behind his glasses and sometimes his lips would move as he mouthed what he was reading. Whenever this happened, Joe would rise from his chair, walk unnoticed toward his library companion, and pull whatever book it was that had Jules so fascinated right out from under his nose, usually met with little sounds of annoyance and snatches of mumbled phrases like ‘train of thought’ and ‘you wouldn’t understand it anyway’. Joe never understood what his friend read, heavy textbooks filled with equations and theories attempting to explain the universe.
“You have the brains,” Joe would say, falling back onto the lounge, “but I have the hair.”
Friday, December 4, 2009
Harsh Reality
Ok.. so before I get into this post, let me bring y’all up to speed by saying that I no longer have health insurance because I was laid off in July. Even if I would consider it, I am NOT eligible for state aid because I receive unemployment. I AM eligibile for a private HMO but have to wait through a 7 month “grace” period.
So with that said …
This past Wednesday, The Good Doctor’s husband came into the shop for turkey. Chief explains that he doesn’t have the turkey that The Good Doctor’s husband likes because I’ve been sick as a dog and without me in the shop or doing the running around, everything is on a skeleton.
The Good Doctor’s husband asks what’s wrong.. Chief goes into my litany of symptoms… and the Good Doctor’s husband tells Chief to have me call ASAP and they’ll fit me in.
So Chief calls me and I am SO NOT A HAPPY CAMPER. I don’t like going to doctors. He knows this but OBVIOUSLY is more concerned about my well being then I am. But now I’m in a bind because it’s The Good Doctor. Who is not only a super sweet person but a really good customer and since Chief had to open his big fat mouth and they’ll willing to fit me in.. I have to call.
Fuck.
It was around lunch time so I figured I’d wait an hour before I call. I tell him this.. he seems satisfied and I rolled over and went back to sleep.
Until my cell phone rang.
Until my cell phone rand that The Good Doctor’s name came up on the caller id.
Fuck! He gave them my freakin’ number.
He knows me SO well!
Wind up is is that I couldn’t be seen until Thursday at 11:15am.
I immediately call Chief and chastised him on giving out my cell phone number. But he knew the deal and was just glad that I made the appointment.
He wanted to come with me but since my appointment was at the start of his lunch rush, I told him I could go at it alone. I figured I’d be feeling better by the next day anyway and also, I didn’t want him there when they weighed me.
Trivial girly stuff.. but it is what it is so what can I tell you.
I actually am NOT feeling any better at the time of my appointment. And as I’m sitting in The Good Doctor’s waiting room I am suddenly overcome by the feeling of passing out. I only ALMOST passed out once and it wasn’t a nice feeling. It was so bad that I couldn’t even hold the pen to fill out the paperwork.
So I get all girly and sniffly and call Chief and tell him that I need him. The shop is only a few blocks away and he was there in an instant. And of course, as soon as he got there I started to feel better and told him he could leave. Of course, he looked at me like I was insane but I knew his mind was on the store and missing the lunch rush money and I started to feel guilty that I had even called him in the first place. But he felt that his place was with me so he stayed.
When we finally got called into the exam room and The Good Doctor started to exam me, and based on what I was telling her she says that there is a very real possibility that I contracted the Pig Virus :: H1N1 to all you non-rednecks :: and that if I had come in sooner she could have given me something that would have made me better faster.
Wonderful. What the hell can I tell you.
She then asked if I smoked. If Chief wasn’t there I would have lied and said that I was able to quit xx months ago or get all giddy and excited by telling her I HAVE XX DAYS CLEAN! but I couldn’t because he was there and so when I told her that I did, OMG.. her reaction was SO FREAKIN’ OVER THE TOP.
I mean.. ok. I know smoking is bad for you. Worse then bad. I get it. I really, really do. I know I’m setting myself up for all kinds of horrible things. And I’m NOT justifying it. I swear, I’m not. But she laid into me SO hard and SO fierce that I really just wanted say LOOK BITCH, CAN WE FOCUS ON THE PIG VIRUS HERE?
Seriously.. I felt like I was in one of the Scared Straight movies that they show teenagers about prison life.
She pulls out this paper with information on the patch and the gum and the things you suck on that will help you quit smoking and wouldn’t get off the subject until I agreed to use one of the above to stop. I played along and went with the things you suck on because they had a coffee flavored one.
The worse part of it all… is that when she gave me the inhaler medicine and the nasal spray.. she proceeded to tell me how much they would cost if I had to go to a pharmacy and get them and that it’s just a waste to give them to me if I’m not going to stop smoking. Then she proceeds to tell me that:
- I shouldn’t even be seeing you because you don’t have insurance and it’s a big liability
- If the president’s healthcare goes through, you wouldn’t even get treatment if you had cancer because you smoke.
Now.. ok.. so since when is getting paid in cash for an office visit more of a liability then being paid for an office visit by an insurance company?
I’ve worked both sides of health care for the past 23 years :: until I got laid off :: so I know how everything works .. and trust me, it’s not the way it’s being presented to the masses.
But I’m not getting into that.. I’m too exhausted and spent to go into all that now. Maybe later.
Anyway.. so she gives me the 200.00 a month inhaler and the 150.00 nasal spray :: but come one, they were samples and didn’t cost her anything :: and then writes me a script for 7 antibiotic pills that cost me 108.00.
I know she didn’t mean to make me feel like I was a dredge of society. But she did.. she made me feel like a failure because I didn’t have health insurance. She made me feel like I was just someone who was coping free medicine. She made me feel like I wasn’t up to her standard and the only reason why she lowered herself to treat me is because her husband loves Chief’s turkey.
She literally had me in tears and I couldn’t wait to get the hell out of there.
On the way home, I told Chief that I absolutely hated him for making me go through with appointment and it was the kind of hate that would never be forgiven.
He said that was fine, as long as I was around long enough to hate him he didn’t care.
Now here’s the thing.. if you want to discuss it or debate it or whatever you can go right ahead but I’m not going to partake. I’ll just leave my 2 cents here for y’all to mull over:
If healthcare is going to be re-vamped, then it needs to be REVAMPED. You can’t half step this one. It’s so bad.. and so corrupt that it literally has to be restructured as a whole.. not bits and pieces of it.
Health Insurance should only be for long term treatments, surgeries, pregnancies and stuff like that. Everything else should be fee for service. You go to the doctors, you pay the doctor visit. If one doctor charges 50.00 a visit, then go to the one that charges 35. The fact that doctor’s do NOT see uninsured people only puts more strain on emergency rooms. We, as a country, are used to having things FAST. And I think because of that, we’ve forgotten when we really need to see a doctor. I can’t tell you how many people sat in the ER complaining of a sore throat.. or an earache.. or something really, really minor. All that did was tie up the ER and waste resources.
If the government is going to model health care on a foreign country, then they should model Italy’s. And I’m not just saying that because I’m Italian.. I’m saying that because I have relatives in Italy and we’ve had this discussion. No system is perfect. Not everybody’s “needs” will be met but we need to move away from what we think we are entitled to and get back to the way things were before we were indoctrinated with insurance is king.
Kids have all inclusive coverage from birth to age 16 .. the elderly are covered from 67 (I believe) on up.. again .. all inclusive. Or 70. I forget.
But doesn’t that make sense?
And how about this? If the government is SO amped on getting involved in this and instead of baiting and switching or money this or money that.. just open freakin’ clinics so that people who can’t afford private health care and who aren’t eligible for medicaid have a place to go to get care if they need it.
Oh.. and welfare? Yea.. make people work for it. Clean the streets.. scrub graffeti .. do what people who get community service have to do.. board up old houses for Christ sake.. something. Anything.
Benjamin Franklin said it best:
I think the best way of doing good to the poor, is not making them easy in poverty, but leading or driving them out of it. I observed…that the more public provisions were made for the poor, the less they provided for themselves, and of course became poorer. And, on the contrary, the less was done for them, the more they did for themselves, and became richer.
Okay.. I think the meds are kicking in and I’m getting all scattered over here. My apologies.. I’ll end my rant now!
Moment of Clarity
“Young and stupid”. Many has been the night that I tried to recite this mantra to myself in fits of self-awareness.
“Remember, you are young and stupid,” I’d silently repeat to myself, “so goddamn young.” When I first started saying this to myself, it was almost a personal call to arms. I had grown weary of what I thought to be my ignorant youth, a time spent behind closed doors and impenetrable masks. My trusty coping mechanisms – lies and deceit – which once shielded me from pain and embarrassment, had ended up cutting me off from the world around me. I was now ready and ravenous for new and foreign experiences.
But I left myself far too open, and I became lost in the woods of my own social decadence. It was then that my mantra transformed into a self-pitying whimper, a defeated cry of surrender. I told myself again and again how young and stupid I was, and thus I convinced myself of my own impotence. In a very real sense, I felt that I was finished.
No longer. Tonight I went for a walk. The weather was cool and crisp, my music soft and comforting. The amphetamines in my veins sharpening my mind. The ambience was perfect for reflection.
And so I thought about the last eighteen months, and all the sloppy, horrific wonders that I have come to know. In that time, I lost my virginity to a landlady eight years my senior. I had been punched in the chest by my now brother-in-law. For the first time in my life, I had said the words “I love you” to a girl and meant it. I’d started smoking and quit. I’d slept with two girls in one night. I saw my sister get married.
After reflecting upon all that I had accomplished in such a short span, I came to realize that I finally understood this mantra. It is not a shield to hide behind when plumbing the depths of depravity. It is not an insult to be self-applied when feeling depravity’s doubled edge. And it is certainly not a cliche to be bandied about by those who aspire to be jaded.
“Young and stupid” is simply this: a calm and jubilant realization that there are far more wonders to be seen and lessons to be learned in this life, and that one should be both clever enough to realize this and stupid enough to keep studying.
Sorry to define a cliche with sentimental treacle. It doesn’t make it any less of a goddamn epiphany.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
king of the culchies
The Culchie Wrap (no audio available):
Now being a Culchie is not so tough, you might look funny and a small bit rough, some of us are single and some are dads, but I’ll tell you one thing, we’re the finest lads. Its time to bring my Culchie Wrap to a close, I’ve to go to the jacks and powder my nose. Its great to see the look on all of you’re faces, when I tell ya that us Culchies are going places.
Do culchies really like cocaine? Someone I knew was at a lock in at a pub in a village in Cork. The farmers were playin 45 and doing coke and smoking weed and drinking crates of cider. That was a few years ago so I can only presume they are worse now.
Finally a list of all the things that define being a culchie.
Sadly it is pretty accurate.
Look at what these idiots did to this kid by fooling him at an Aaaaart competition in Aaaaardee by the sounds of it:
Here is Tubridy actually getting a ride:
Pirates Log 117= P-wing Rings jackets+Hulk 17 + Faust apr Radiohead.
These are all of the known colors of the p-wing ring jacket colors that i know of. I love the fade that these jackets get when they show their age.
Pwing ring jackets
And here is the variant cover to hulk 17. Great issue if you get to pick it up.
Hulk 17
and here is another interesting radio head video. see if you can figure out the meaning of the video Faust apr